Walking Through Grief and Disappointment

Reflecting on Loss

On September 21, 2025, my older brother DeWayne passed away. His transition from this life to the next is shrouded in mystery; the exact circumstances surrounding his final moments are unknown to us. We are left with questions: Did he suffer a fall resulting in a brain bleed? Was it a heart attack or a stroke? Did he experience pain or fear, or was he enveloped in peace? These questions remain unanswered, and some things may never be known on this side of eternity.

Facing the Reality of Grief

What we do know is the heartbreak, uncertainty, anxiety, and pain that loss brings. It feels unfair, especially when we did not have the opportunity to say the things we wished, share one last hug, or hear his laughter once more. The challenge now is determining how to move forward, find understanding, and make sense of everything. These questions linger not only for me but also for DeWayne's wife and children, who must navigate what comes next.

The Familiar Path of Grief

Death and grief are not strangers to me. I have experienced the loss of parents, grandparents, my first husband, and numerous relatives and friends. There is also the pain of lost relationships, which can be as agonizing as physical loss. In the midst of grief and disappointment, I ask what or who provides purpose, peace, and the strength to heal and move beyond these moments.

Faith and Grace in the Midst of Sorrow

It is Jesus and the grace He extends that sustains the faith already within me. He invites me to focus my thoughts on Him—His character, love, and perspective. This is the place of true faith, where I can live in His presence and experience His promises and provision. This faith does not require me to deny reality. Biblical faith does not attempt to make things appear better than they are or force a sense of comfort about what is clearly not good. Death, sickness, separation, disappointment, and offense are painful realities.

The Power of Meditation and Perspective

Biblical faith faces reality head-on; it does not retreat or attempt to convince us otherwise. God invites me to use the faith He has given, fueled by His grace, to pursue an outcome better than depression, doubt, or inertia. I have the choice to avoid letting these harsh realities dominate my thoughts. When I meditate on God’s glory as the source of my life, I am able to see reality clearly. Focusing on my losses and disappointments only amplifies them, but meditating on God reminds me that by grace, I am connected to Someone infinitely greater than any sorrow or problem I could ever encounter. He truly is the answer.

Psalm 19:14 Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O LORD my rock and my Redeemer.